written 03-02-08 God's will for my life

written 03-02-08
Sun
20:30ish

i have said to my Lord, “here I am, I am Yours”, “take me, mold me”, “tell me where to go, I’ll go”, “tell me what to do, I’ll do it”, “I am not my own, I am Yours”, “purge me, grow me”, “how can I serve You”, “how can I Love You”,…I waited for His boomin, thundering voice to send me to Kenya with the alone, or the streets with the homeless, or the dark alleys with the dangerous. This response never came.
Instead I heard a quietly firm reply, “honor your dad and mom, and love your brothers”…
… I almost answered “that’s it?”, but before I could, I began to fully know the magnitude of His command. I now know God’s will for my life, and I don’t have the slightest doubt that He will show me the next direction at the right time.
He has given me a desire to go to Kenya, the streets, and the alleys and dark places. He will open the doors that are right at the time that is right.
When I stop surrendering and sacrificing myself, even for a moment, I am sticking my fingers in my ears while God is talking. The greatest things aren’t always the most impressive. These sentences are so incomplete. I could write for hours.